/r/nottheonion - top ten submissions for each month of 2026
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nottheonion 2025
2026, July
42427 Katy Perry Gets Trapped in Giant Bottle During ...
27336 Adolf Hitler’s birthplace in Austria reopens as...
24814 Mexico Warns of Diarrhea Risk When Visiting US
24235 Looksmaxxer Connor Murphy 'injected himself' wi...
22892 Teacher arrested for clapping in support of spe...
22600 Man Walks 16 Km To Safety After Impaling Himsel...
20006 Carmakers Don't Think They Should Have to Fix B...
19300 YouTube Bans Popular ASMR Artists, Accusing The...
18051 Windows 11 Copilot now tells you what’s slowing...
17779 DoE Deletes Webpage Instructing People To Lower...
2026, June
29928 Mt. Olive Pickles withdraws from Great American...
25166 Mamdani repeals bedtime for New York City stude...
24721 Enemy lesbian nuns quit convent and marry each ...
23607 Josh Brolin wonders "what the fuck he got himse...
23136 UFC Fighter Declares “Michelle Obama Is a Man” ...
20287 Woman who banned herself from Pennsylvania casi...
19762 ‘Please avoid chugging your ranch’: TSA forced ...
18041 Ohio Police Retire “Robocop” After It Heroicall...
17207 ICE releases a Texas nun intercepted walking to...
17078 Texas woman injured by McDonald’s Sausage McMuf...
2026, May
37156 Stephen Miller calls Talarico ‘transgender.’ De...
33922 CEO of $300 million company says ‘problems disa...
28620 SNL’s Colin Jost said Hegseth sketch was reject...
27520 Starbucks CEO defends $9 coffee says ‘it’s not ...
27327 Charges dismissed for woman without right hand ...
26624 Pope Leo called his bank's customer service lin...
22962 Email from Susie Wiles warning White House staf...
19331 Christian missionary hailed as ‘holiest man ali...
18881 White House East Wing debris dumped at nearby g...
18668 Hospital says RFK Jr. did not operate robotic a...
2026, April
49125 Orban’s Chances of Winning Hungary Election Dro...
47638 Church of Scientology is mad teens keep running...
40721 Amazon worker dies on warehouse floor; colleagu...
37057 Vance says pope should ‘be careful’ when talkin...
33789 Scientists Tracking the Microplastic Pollution ...
32695 You’re no John F. Kennedy: RFK Jr. repeatedly r...
31020 ‘It took nine seconds’: Claude AI agent deletes...
28047 Texas school sent waiver for parents to allow k...
26661 Pete Hegseth quotes fake Pulp Fiction Bible ver...
25665 Dave Chappelle Says ‘I Resent the Republican Pa...
2026, March
42290 DOGE cancelled a $349,000 grant to replace a mu...
40731 Tulsi Gabbard stuns senator by saying it’s not ...
40161 MTG turns on Fox News: Ex Rep says channel is ‘...
39485 Erika Kirk appointed to Air Force Academy board
37263 Man dies in crash at intersection where he peti...
35534 Hegseth blew $7M on lobsters in $93B spending s...
31173 YouTuber Roasted For Claiming He is ‘Stranded’ ...
30951 Five Guys CEO says he gave $1.5 million bonus t...
29505 Deaf woman removed from Frontier flight for "no...
26690 NTSB chair: LaGuardia crash investigator was st...
2026, February
56563 FBI concluded Jeffrey Epstein wasn’t running a ...
46865 "Training a human takes 20 years of food." Sam ...
39131 Musk offers to pay legal fees for any Epstein v...
38674 Condom shortage hits Winter Olympics as supplie...
36911 Peter Thiel warns the Antichrist and apocalypse...
36637 Pokémon GO team removes PokéStop that appeared ...
35136 Hegseth says he’ll order random pizzas to throw...
35121 Netflix says users can cancel service if HBO Ma...
31588 Zelenskyy suggests ceasefire to allow elections...
31078 RFK Jr ridiculed as he promotes strange fitness...
2026, January
62945 ICE agents ate meal at a Minnesota Mexican rest...
51773 Germany issues formal travel advisory for US
49750 US Army Poorly Prepared for Arctic Operations: ...
35149 Nearly 400 millionaires and billionaires across...
35144 McDonald’s hit with class action lawsuit claimi...
34114 White House alters arrest photo of ICE proteste...
34085 Texas becomes first state to end American Bar A...
31861 Following leaked messages, House Republican edu...
28071 “Are You Dead?” app designed for people living ...
26669 Family says HOA told them they couldn’t use the...
